Monday, September 3, 2012

A Different Kind of Labor Day


In honor of it being Labor Day I thought it would be appropriate to begin this post with a story of a different kind of labor day – the day Liam was born.  I mentioned my nephew Liam in “Forever Twirling” and gave twitter-length description of him, but I want to tell you more.  You’ll want to know more too – he’s bound for greatness after all. 
He was born on my parents’ 33rd wedding anniversary back in December 2011.  As we waited anxiously in the waiting room on the labor and delivery floor to hear of his arrival I contemplated on how I would bond with this new little guy.  My nephew Jeremiah, who’s now two (going on five – his words not mine) and I spend an inordinate amount of time together.  On average we’re together at least full two days a week while his mommy gets much needed rest to recover from working nights in an emergency room.  Although sometimes, a lot of times it’s tiring (he’s a mover and a shaker now) I really do treasure my auntie time with him.  I know it’s blessing that I get to spend so much time with this little guy.  Also the fact that I need to soak all the time I have left with him while I live locally is not lost on me.  That being said I wondered if I would feel as close to Liam as I do Jeremiah.  I know that’s sort of a “Debby Downer” thought, but it’s honest.
When my brother Andrew came out to the waiting room and told us that all 8 pounds 12 ounces of Liam had arrived I expected him to me oozing with that “new father glow”.   He went onto say that Erica made it safely through the c-section procedure (Liam was sitting, literately staging a sit-in in her womb and would not move to get in birthing position) so I thought that we were home free.  Although I had expected Andrew to be a bit giddier as he relayed the news of his new addition his bittersweet expression was explained in his next sentence.  He went onto say that Liam’s feet mirrored mine when I was born, and that he wasn’t moving his legs much.  In his basinet in the nursery you saw a full head of dark hair like daddy, a sweet face like his mama, and his aunt’s bilateral club feet.
            The next few days were spent waiting on the neonatologist to determine what the next step would be.  When they were checking him out the day after he was born they discovered that both his left and right femurs were broken (he got a leg up on me – I was born with only one broken femur).  It also became clear that his knees and hips were out of sorts so to speak.  He looked a lot like a butterflied turkey: hips dislocated out to the side and knees bent.  In hindsight looking at Liam’s sit-in all of us are so happy that his parents made the choice a week before his birth to schedule the c-section.   If he was delivered traditionally his knees and hips could pose more of a risk to both baby and mom.  Due to his unique physique from the waist down his femurs weren’t cast normally.  Instead he had a crazy looking harness on that went over his shoulders, around his back, and kept his legs pretty stabilized.  That harness although effectively helped his bones heal in a few weeks made life pretty miserable for Liam and his parents.
            Getting this little guy home was an adventure that nobody knew how would end.  My parents having been through almost the exact same scenario with me as a newborn, thought that he could just ride home in a regular car seat.  However the harness didn’t allow Liam to bend at the waist, thus he couldn’t sit.  The hospital mandated that he be transported in an approved car seat or “car bed”.  The next question we all asked “What the heck is a car bed?  And where can we get one?”  Apparently it’s like a mini hospital bed that actually straps into your car.  Finding a place to purchase one, getting insurance to cover the excessive cost, and obtaining one on a Sunday afternoon is pretty much impossible.  The next option was to leave Liam at the hospital until they could figure another way to get him home.  For new parents – physically, emotionally, spiritually exhausted parents that was not an option.  How could they handle leaving their new baby behind? 
            Andrew put a desperate plea for prayer out on facebook.  Since Liam’s birth (and the many weeks following) I have never seen my brother so physically and emotionally fragile.  Those requests for prayer are what kept Andrew and Erica going – we know that, but that’s a different topic.  Anyways people were made aware of the situation and many offered suggestions.  One of Andrew’s friends that he graduated high school with is an EMT and volunteers at our local fire department saw the plea and had an idea.  He used his connections to secure an infant sized emergency medical transport backboard.  The hospital gave the “ok” and by that evening all of them were home in their own house.
            Although I don’t personally know, I’ve had a backstage pass of watching both my siblings become parents for the first time.  It’s overwhelming.  Whether your child is born and everything works the way it should, or there’s physical challenges it’s completely life altering.   There isn’t any sleep, and when you have time for sleep you can’t because you’re worried if you and your child will survive this learning curve.  The next few weeks were rough, there’s no sugar coating that, but they made it through.  It was a tremendous time of growth for us all.  There were several times that I struggled in a way that no one else really understood.  Someday I’ll write about it and perhaps there will be someone else who was born with a physical disability, and had a family member born with a similar one that will get it.
In early February Liam was finally rid of the harness, femurs all healed.  When Liam was born my orthopedic doctor was out of the country, but his practice is hooked into the hospital that Liam was born at, so he became a patient there. Let me just say, I have the best ortho doc in the world.  It’s not bias, it’s fact.  Since becoming my doctor when I was just a day old he’s gone onto becoming the head of orthopedics at one of the state’s leading teaching hospitals.  Once he was back in the country he snatched up Liam’s file.  We don’t have a whole lot of information to go on when it comes to about what condition Liam and I both have, it’s really bits and pieces of various things.  The fact that Liam has the same doctor that has been working with me since day one is a huge deal, HUGE.
There’s a lot more to Liam’s story as I’m sure you can imagine, however this post is already getting to be pretty long.  Let me wrap this up by expelling the notion that I once had about having trouble bonding with Mr. Liam.  He and I are literately two of a kind.  No one ever wishes a physical handicap on someone, and I’m certainly not rejoicing in the fact that he currently is following in my footsteps (horrible pun not intended.  Ok maybe a little bit…) I am simply trying to look at this with my sometimes annoyingly present optimism.  Everything that is vital to life works, and he’s a lot better off than some babies.  I look at his situation with the same mindset that I see my own with – it is what it is, and it’s not going to stop us from living our lives.  Liam’s future is unknown.  We still hold the hope that we’ll see him walking, but if that’s not in the cards so be it.  He’s eight months old and has already made an impact on so many.  I mean the kid has a Facebook group dedicated to him with over 100 members :-p
Liam stating the fact that he is fearfully and wonderfully made- photo by God Given Photography